If you were walking down the hall

And you passed my room this morning, this is what you would have heard. . .

Jenny: I was in a doorway the other day and I heard clicking heels, so I turned around, totally expecting to see a girl behind me--but no! It was a guy. A guy with clicky heels.
Curtis: Clicky?
Jenny: Yeah, like tap heels, but not really. You know the sound that high heels make when girls walk down a hall? It's like that. And I keep noticing it on guys.
Curtis: Are there different kinds of clicky heels?
Jenny: Why yes, there are. But the Bush administration is currently in the process of rating the levels of click. They're a bit confused by the term "click"--one too many syllables for 'em.
Me: Oh god, they're not going to come out with a color scale, are they? There's no way to figure out the difference between a blue click and a green click.
Curtis: Warning! It's a red click! Headed your way!
Jenny: No no no. . . it would have to be mauve.
Curtis: Mauve?
Me: *looking down* The sad thing is I can easily start naming different shades of mauve right now.
Curtis: *looks confused* Different shades of mauve?
Me: You know, antique mauve, rose mauve--
Jenny: Okay, Allison. That's something you just don't tell people. It's one thing to tell people you have a mole on your ass, but it's quite another to start telling them you know different shades of mauve.
Me: That is such a false analogy!
Curtis: Are there really that many people with moles on their asses? And how would you ever know? Psychological studies have shown that people are highly unlikely to tell you if they have moles on their asses.
Jenny: But we do know. One in seven.


We're not normal.